Rambam Wore a Polo to Shul

Do you ever wonder why there's no Divre Yoel in YU's beis? Have you ever searched for Hameshet Haderashot on the Mirer's shelves?

Each camp of the frum world has designated for itself classic rabbinic figures as ancestors to its modern philosophy. Modoxy has undoubtedly placed the flag of torah umadda on the Rambam. The Yeshivish community clearly appropriated Rashi. Why is this so? Who else has been divided amongst the battle lines? This video presents a survey of an in-depth analysis of all the Rabbis who have been usurped by the different ideologies of the Orthodox world today.

Dubai Assasination

As details continue to surface about the assassination of Mahmoud al-Mabhouh in Dubai in January, so do the questions. Who killed him? Was the killing justified? Is the use of fake passports legal? For every question that arises there are many answers. When asked if he thought that the killings were justified, one Israeli student said that "there are definitely some questionable legal issues, but morally it was fine." Another Israeli suggested that "this [assassination] was definitely not the best legal situation; the Israelis managed to get Adolph Eichmann to Israel and have him put on trial... but this [form of judgement] was the next best thing." Although some people had their doubts, one Israeli summed up the general mood: "If a man had a knife to your throat, and you were holding a gun, would you try to extradite the man and put him to trial?" This story is far from finished.
Until the operation there was a terrorist, while now there is no terrorist. No innocent lives were taken, and no innocent people were injured, and nobody disagrees with that. As more details arise the facts will hopefully become clearer, and the final judgement will be able to be passed.

M&M Turns to Its Readers for Suggestions for Israel Column

This weekly piece will try to voice the Israeli opinion on Israel-related topics. For those who don't know, I was a member of Class of '12 until seventh grade before I moved to Israel. I live in the city of Beit Shemesh and go to school at Chorev in Yerushalaim. I hope to properly express the voice of Israelis, particularly the religous youth, on controversial topics. Any topics deemed worth discussing about the Israeli matziv should be advanced in the comments section of this post.

M&M Goes International

As the size of M&M's reader base steadily stays the same, Maimo & Matziv is growing to a whole new level.
A correspondence is now existent and soon operant between M&M and a reporter in the Land of Israel.
M&M is very excited about the expansion and looks forward to bringing in a wider variety of article topics. The new correspondent will address issues pertinent to Israeli Jewry, politics, and basically, Matziv. Look out for the label "Israel" at the end posts relating to the Holy Land.
Readers wishing to become M&M contributors should contact the M&M general editor by whichever means they can.

M-Cats Go Down Clawing, Mock Trial Wins

Members of the boys' varsity basketball team "should feel nothing but pride," asserted a prominent Limudei Kodesh teacher at Maimo.
The M-Cats' loss on Tuesday night culminated a season of victories and disappointments. After posting a regular-season record of 12-4, the team lost 64-60 (and according to the MIAA website 65-60) to Snowden High School, eliminating the M-Cats from the state tournament.
Before the game, one member of the team remarked, "it's great that Snowden is a much better team that we are. This way people are expecting us to lose and there's no pressure." Maimonides administrators arranged for the game to take place in the nearby Brookline High School, as Maimo's gym is not usable for post-season play. M-Cats fans had a large turnout at the game, and one sophomore even made enormous banners to be held to cheer on the school's players.
"It's just frustrating," commented one M-Cat, "I know we played hard and I know we played well (especially in the second half), but it would have been better had we won." Nonetheless, a Maimonides teacher says that "it was the best game he had ever seen since he came in 1997."
Maimo was down 15 points in the beginning of the second half, but mounted a comeback and managed to gain a 1-point lead over Snowden in the fourth quarter. Unfortunately, the lead was not kept and Maimo will not advance to any further round of the tournament.

The boys' varsity team did defeat Gann twice, though, sweeping the season series between the rival schools.

The girls varsity basketball team lost to their Georgetown High School opponents.

Maimo's intellectual team scored its third regular-season win, its 12th consecutive victory. The triumph came by a margin of one point. "It was the craziest trial I had been to," said a sophomore who had an active role in the trial.
The judge threw Maimo a curve ball and it was just able to hit a walk-off single. Instead of hearing each team's closing arguments, the officiator asked the lawyers questions regarding the case. Once he determined that a summing of the teams scores rendered them tied, the judge allowed for the closing to proceed normally. A perfect 10 was awarded to Maimo's closing as opposed to the 9 for the opponent's final remarks. Every other participant received a score of 9.
One of the Mock Trial captains who observed the trial called the trial a "nail-bitter" and wrote in an email that "he personally believes that we watchers had an equally tough job."
The team plays Cambridge Rindge & Latin in the tie-breaker round on Wednesday, March 3 at 2 p.m. at the Newton City Hall to determine who will advance into post-season play and who will rest his case.

Read more: "M-CATS BATTLE IN STATE TOURNAMENT"

Highlights

M&M is gaining new readers every day. Some are not impressed by a welcome article of harsh restriction oncommenting and may never come back. M&M has therefore decided to provide links here to the best of the month.
These articles have been selected based on their commenters' responses and other factors.

Please read:

• Goyish Satmar Hechsher, in which a Kiryas Joel Kashrus organization's antizionism is questioned, and
• Master Massefski, in which a careful psycholanalysis of the Spectrum's general editor's article "Up in the Air" reveals that he wishes to be principal of the Maimonides School.

To read, simply click on the green hyperlinked text.

For those wondering what on earth the second part of M&M's name is, please read the introduction to this blog.

Also, make sure to refer to M&M's general disclaimer lest you file a class-action suit against this blog and invest millions of dollars in legal expenses only to figure out that M&M has a not-at-all-legally-functional disclaimer.

Pre-Purim Shpiel?

M&M is proud to make a rumor an official rumor.

The age-old tradition at Maimo has always been that the Purim Shpiel is after the Purim night Megilah reading. The tradition is allegedly being paused this year.

In un-walled cities, the Megilah is normally read on the night of the 14th of Adar, which falls out this year on the 28th of February, Saturday night. The Purim Shpiel, consequentially, would be performed on מוצאי שבת.

The Purim Shpiel is a comical play meant to reflect the happy mood of the ancient Rabbinic holiday. It varies in form from community to community, but in Maimo the Purim Shpiel entails several, usually intertwined, skits of mockery of teachers and administrators, as well as multimedia inserts throughout the play. The senior class is the organizer, producer and acting troupe of the performance.

Rumor has it that this year, the Purim Shpiel will not be held neither on Purim nor even at night. The Shpiel will be presented during the last three periods this Friday. A senior has confirmed this rumor. "The administration is being really uncooperative, so it looks like it's going to happen the last three periods on Friday."

The general reaction of the senior class is not a positive one. Upon learning that a 70% percent chance of a snowfall threatens to befall the area on Friday and perhaps even cancel school, one senior was heard exclaiming today in the library, "see--even Hashem wants the Shpiel to happen on Saturday night.

"In charge" of the Purim Shpiel is senior Ari Massefski, "but Max Bessler and Yiriel Liss have definitely helped," remarked another member of the graduating class.

Comments Policy

M&M is extremely pleased to see how many comments are being posted lately, probably as a result of the recent article "Coming Attractions." However, a recent abuse in comments has made need for a policy to be set.

1. M&M does not want to impose too many limitations or restrictions on the commenting. (Don't draw conclusions--M&M is non-partisan. [Until the next election, at least.]) Nevertheless, M&M must be a safe environment for all posters. In order to preserve a comfortable setting, it is vital to maintain the anonymity of the those who comment who choose to remain anonymous.


2. Therefore, any comment which jeopardizes the full anonymity or which may disclose any private information which should not be disclosed will promptly be removed or edited.


3. M&M owns all comments and information posted on this site.


4. It is official M&M policy that the attempt to discover the identity of any anonymous commenter is an offensive and inappropriate act. Therefore, all M&M readers are requested in the strongest manner to abstain from attempting to uncover the identity of any anonymous commenter.


5. Should an M&M reader have an inkling of suspicion as to the identity of a commenter, the reader is to keep that suspicion to himself or herself and never disseminate that feeling to anyone else.


6. The statements of this policy shall be nullified in regards to a commenter when he or she shall make his or her identity known. This provides for people to discuss the first name of the commenter who has revealed his or her first name but not more. Thus, the level of allowed discussion of a commenter's identity is equal to the degree of identification to which the commenter has identified himself or herself.


7. This policy shall be accepted by all readers upon opening the web page of this blog. This policy is effective immediately and retroactively.

M&M chose to make this policy in a pseudo-legal format because it was a good shtickle to do so. Additionally, M&M recently read the actual proposed act of forbidding circumcision in Massachusetts. The Vos Iz Neias news story covering this act can be found by clicking here.

M&M would also like to inform its readers that it doesn't care if anyone understood what was said above. Basically, M&M reserves the right to do whatever it wants with anything on this site.

Gastronomical Gimmicks

Many people aim to eat healthily and take pride in a bonus nutrient they can sneak into a snack or smoothie. Vitamins are an old trophy for the health eater. Calcium supplements are newer additions to people’s diets. Today, there is an obsession with novel additions to people’s eating habits. Most of these “wholesome” and “beneficial” ingredients were unheard-of ten years ago.
True, the study of biochemistry and vitamins and minerals has greatly advanced in the last decade. However, it seems like every tomato farmer and soy bean agriculturalist knows more about what’s good for consumers’ livers and digestive tracts than veteran doctors.
This morning’s cereal boxes advertised more iron and calcium and zinc and aluminum and tin and lithium and nickel, vitamins and everything good. Of course, it didn’t advertise its 9g of highly-processed sugar. One can picture a mother feeling very accomplished when she feeds her toddler a “nutritious” breakfast, feeding him so that he can grow big and strong. "Strong" is a doubtful outcome of that meal, but "big"—horizontally, that is—is quite likely.
About five years ago Heinz Ketchup® changed its whole look to accommodate a new label advertising the “powerful antioxidant lycopene.” Many consumers who had never before heard of such a nutrient wondered why no doctor had ever told them that they would eventually rust were it not for a daily dose of ketchup.
More recently the whole grains campaign took flight. A sudden awareness of being cheated out of baked products for thousands of years maddened consumers and brought them to demand the complete grain and not just some rip-off portion of it.
Newest, however, is soymilk’s benefits. In today’s age of rampant vegan lifestyles, the popularity of non-dairy alternative to cows’ milk has soared. Soymilk can taste good, whether one believes it or not. But the best part of soymilk is undoubtedly its isoflavenoids. Microsoft Word spellchecker doesn’t even recognize the word. Most consumers of soymilk presumably have no idea what the aforementioned “nutrients” are or what their function is. However, the drinker of such a product is entitled to feel quite self-righteous for taking such good care of his or her body.
The fish market has also recently experienced a boost after the invention—discovery, that is—of omega-3 fish oils. One must figure that if something bears a name which is the combination of a Greek letter and a number, connected by a dash, it must pose invaluable health benefits to the body. Perhaps it does, but one must suspect that the greater benefits go to the fishermen who recently suffered the mercury-in-the-tuna scandal.
Instead of mowing lawns and shoveling walks, the entrepreneur should just discover a new food item with health benefits. And if the benefit is unknown, or doesn’t actually exist, he or she can follow in the footsteps of every other nutritionist and claim that it helps the heart.
Perhaps these substances really do help one’s physique and health. Nevertheless, more nourishing than the alleged benefits of all these dietary enhancements is the release of endorphins prompted by the consumer upon discovering that yet another healthy ingredient has been found in chocolate or schmaltz herring.

M&M Readers Are Pious People, Poll Shows

A recent poll conducted on Maimomatziv.blogspot.com has revealed that readers of the newly-started blog are into תורה לשמה.
A grand total of 9 people participated in the poll. It is possible, however--even likely--that some participants voted twice. The creator and host of the poll, M&M decided not to force voters to have cookies enabled and thus allow for possible double-voting.
"I just hate cookies, and it wouldn't be fair to make my readers enable them just to ensure accuracy of my anyways-informal poll," stated an M&M spokesPERSON.
Participants were asked why they pay attention during Talmud class and were allowed to select multiple answers from "for the grade," "for the Torah" and "I don't pay attention."
While only 22% of voters admitted that they don't pay attention in Talmud class, a striking 77% proudly marked that they pay attention for the Torah. An additional 33% said that they pay attention for the grade.
M&M plans to change nothing in the blog's style, even given the poll results.